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Reaching My Limit

I simply can't take it anymore. People truly don’t understand how much I’ve tolerated throughout the duration of my marriage, or my life before. I don’t have any tolerance or compassion left for more negativity, criticism, manipulation, or control. At a certain point you realize that’s just how the person is, but that does NOT mean I have to put up with you just because you’re family. I shouldn’t ever have to 'tolerate' anyone, but I have, and I have bullies in my now extended (formally immediate) family. You wouldn't tell a victim of incest rape to be around their rapist "because he's family", so why should I be forced to deal with another kind of toxicity??? I’ve had enough. I've had enough of the secretive abuse. I've had enough of the relentless control tactics. I've had enough of the guilt trips. I've had enough of the childish tantrums over minor miscommunications. And, I have had enough of the nonstop suffering I have been enduring. Whatever happened in previous generations ends with me. Period. Generational toxicity within the black family must be destroyed.

I'm about to bring my first child into the world during a MF pandemic. None of the toxicity that has been invading my pregnancy is welcome in my life. My first & part of my second trimesters were ruined by toxic comments, control attempts, and drama. We tried for 10 years for this baby & I'll be damned if I'm about to let you ruin this experience for me in any way. I refuse to raise my daughter in or around such utter bullshit. So, please exit stage left if it is just too difficult for you to respect simple boundaries, I'm done dealing with grown ass people who need to be coddled.

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